My blogs will be rants . They will not always be agreed with – feel free to challenge. Sometimes they will be good rants, sometimes they will be mad rants, they will never be bad rants though. Today I am going to have a mad rant about something that really does distress me.. Buses!

I am a reasonably ecological person. I recycle just about everything I can. I always buy British and as much local stuff as I can. I reuse bags . Yes I do my bit. If I am going on a long journey, I will take the train. BUT I am sorry – you can all deride me – I HATE buses.

I have done my bit. I used buses for all of my life. Then at 41 I passed my driving test and got a car. Moment of revelation!

No more standing at a bus stop in the cold and the wet, waiting for a bus that is late.

No more surly bus drivers driving away while you are still struggling to find a seat.

No more mad people sitting next to me regaling me with their life histories ( Shut up madam, I really do not care about your daughter’s husband’s brothers bad breath problem , neither do I want to examine your in growing toe nails ). Why do I always get the crazy people?

No more people who think that we all want to hear about what they got up to last weekend.

No more people with colds, coughs and sneezes who like to share.

No more standing swaying as the bus driver who thinks that he could teach Lewis Hamilton to drive takes the corners and bends at what feels like 50 miles per hour.

Oh and then there is the total inconvenience of the things. To get from Wycombe to Aylesbury you have to go via Scotland (well you may as well do for the time it takes). I am a person who likes to go from A to B as efficiently as possible without going via C D E F G and H as well. I can’t bear it when the bus stops every thirty seconds and then the person who gets on has their purse at the bottom of the bag and rifles through it for ages before producing a £20 note with an apologetic expression as the driver snarls at them. Or else someone gets on the bus and wants complicated directions to somewhere where the bus is not even going.

Today I got on a bus for the first time in ages – the Park and Ride in Oxford. I think Park and Rides are a good idea and I would use them again. However I still do not get the bus love. Everytime the driver changed gear, the bus jolted – lovely! The mad person behind me was keeping up a running commentary every time the bus turned the corner, the bus stopped every flipping thirty yards and there was a child screaming!

I got to my car, windows down, music on and drove home. Bliss, stress free. I was in charge of my destiny. I could stop or go. I could please myself.

No – buses are nasty smelly inconvenient nuisances.

However , next blog will be the glory of trains, just so you all don’t think I am a complete environmental nightmare.

Thank you and goodnight.

By demoness